Showing posts with label Jokes on santa. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jokes on santa. Show all posts

SANTA AUR CHEMIST!!

Posted on 05:52 by Unknown
SANTA AUR CHEMIST!!
!

!

Santa Chemist Ke Pass Gaya

Aur Bola: “Bhai Kuch Help Chahiye”

Chemist: “Haan Bolo?”

Aur Santa Ne Apni Davayi Ki Bottle Mein Se

Ek Chamach Chemist Ko Pila Ke Pucha:“Meetha Hai Kya?”

Chemist: “Nahi To, Kyu Kya Hai Ye”

Santa: “Bas Yahi Puchna Tha,

Doctor Ne Kaha Tha Ki Chemist Ke Paas Jakar Urine Test Karwa Kar Pata Karo Ki Urine Mein Sugar Hai Ke Nahi“

CHEMIST SHOCKED SANTA ROCKED
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SANTA APNI WIFE KI DELIVERY KE TIME

Posted on 05:41 by Unknown
!!SANTA APNI WIFE KI DELIVERY KE TIME!!

Nurse: Aapko Judwa Bacche Huye.

Santa: Hona Hi Tha ji Picture Hi Aise Dekhi Thi.

Dhoom 2
!
Golmaal 2
!
Raaz 2
!
Don 2

saare ke saare 2's

Nurse: Achcha Hua Delhi-6 Nahi Dekhi.....
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Pappu ko ek lawaris bandar mila...

Posted on 05:57 by Unknown
Pappu ko ek lawaris bandar mila...

Wo usko police station le gya..

Inspector ne kaha, isko zoo le ke jao.


Next day inspector ne pappu ko bandar k sath bus stop par dekha,


inspector: isko zoo nahi le kar gaye???


Pappu: kal gaye the, khub ghume, bada maza aya,

!

!
Aaj Qutub Minar ja rahe hai...
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Santa was watching peter and tom and he die...

Posted on 05:25 by Unknown
Peter : I want my money now !

Tom : I will kill myself so that I won't pay you..

"he pulled a gun & shot himself & dead"

Peter : hahaha..... If u think u'll get away with my money ur wrong,
I'll follow you until you pay me..

Peter takes the gun n shot him self dead as well..

Santa was watching from a distance he laughed & said : these guys are funny, I want to watch this till the end....

he also took the gun and killed himself !

TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENS AT THE END...
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Santa is appearing on (KBC) Kaun Banega Crorepati

Posted on 05:22 by Unknown
Santa is appearing on "Kaun Banega Crorepati (KBC)" with Amitabh Bachchan.

Amitabh: "Santa, you`re up to Rs Fifty lakhs, with one lifeline left: phone a friend.
If you get it right, the next question is worth a crore rupees If you get it wrong,
you drop back to Rs 3,20,000. Are you ready?"

Santa: "Yes."

Amitabh: "Which of the following birds does not build it`s own nest? Is it A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush."

Santa: "I`d like to phone a friend. I`d like to call Banta."

Banta answers the phone: "Hello?"

Amitabh: "Hello Banta ji, it`s Amitabh Bachchan from KBC. I have your friend Santa here who needs your help to answer the final question.
The next voice you hear will be Santa`s...''

Santa: "Banta, which of the following birds does not build it`s own nest? Is it
 A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush."

Banta: "Oh geez, Santa. That`s simple. It`s a cuckoo."

Santa: "Are you sure?"

Banta: "I`m sure."

Amitabh: "Santa, you heard Banta. Do you keep the fifty lakhs or play for one crore?"

Santa: "I want to play; I`ll go with C) cuckoo".

Amitabh:" Is that your final answer?"

Santa: "Yes."

Amitabh: "Confident?"

Santa: "Yes; I think Banta`s pretty smart."

Amitabh: "You said C) cuckoo... And you`re right! Congratulations, you have just won ONE CRORE!"

To celebrate, Santa flies Banta to Ludhiana. That night they go out on the town.
As they`re sipping champagne, Santa looks at Banta and asks him,
"Tell me, how did you know that it was the cuckoo that does not build its own nest?"

"It was easy," replies Banta.

"Everybody knows that cuckoos live in clocks."
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Santa ki modern wife

Posted on 03:25 by Unknown
Santa ki modern wife ne use office jaate waqt pyaar se kaha. . 'see you in the evening' . . . . . . . . Santa: 'main bhi tujhe dekh lunga kameeni, . . dhamki apne baap ko dena
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Yaar Uth Bhukamp Aa Raha Hai

Posted on 03:23 by Unknown
Banta: " Yaar Uth Bhukamp Aa Raha Hai, Saara Ghar Hil Raha Hai.. . . . . . . . . . . . Santa: " Soja-Soja Ghar Girega To Makaan Maalik Ka, Hum To Kirayedar Hain...
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Ek Din Santa samundar me dahi daal raha tha..

Posted on 04:58 by Unknown
Ek Din Santa samundar me dahi daal raha tha.. Banta: kya kar raha hai? Santa: Lassi bana raha hun. Banta: Yeh kya Pagalpan hai?? Teri aisi harkaton se hi log hum pe joke banate hai.. ab bata..... . . . . . . . . . Itni Saari Lassi kon piyega...??
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During an English lesson.....

Posted on 03:34 by Unknown
During an English lesson, the teacher notices that a boy was not paying attention to her.

Teacher:
!
!
Pappu, join these two sentences together...

I was cycling to school. I saw a dead body.
!
!
!
!
!
!
Pappu: (thinking for a while) I saw a dead body cycling to school.
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zyada lecture dene se bezti bhi ho jati hai ...

Posted on 04:33 by Unknown
Story: once a boy was smoking atairport.

Girl asked:1 din me kitne cigrete peete ho.?

Boy:why.?

Girl: Agar ab tak zindagi mein cirgrete pe kharch kiye huye paise bachate to samne khari hui car tmhari hoti...

Boy: Ap cigrate peeti hai..?

Girl: No.

Boy: To kya wo car apki hai..?

Girl: No.

Boy: Thanks for advice,Wo car meri he hai...

MORAL: zyada lecture dene se bezti bhi ho jati hai ..

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Santa ki shaadi ek nurse se ho gayi...

Posted on 04:28 by Unknown
Santa ki shaadi ek nurse se ho gayi.

Banta: Aur santa, kaisi nibh rahi hai?

Santa: Pooch mat yaar, jab tak sister na kaho, bolti hi nahi 
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Ek baar Santa Gangubai k ghar jata hai

Posted on 04:27 by Unknown
Ek baar Santa Gangubai k ghar jata hai aur darwaza knock karta hai.

Gangubai: Kaun ?

Santa: Mai !

Gangubai: Main kaun?

Santa: are pagali Tu Gangubai 
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