Khul k Maze lo


America ka baap


Santa : Maine apne bete ka naam America rakha hai.
.
... banta: wo kyun?
.
Santa: main duniya ko batana chahta hun ke main America ka baap hun.

Girl chatting with a boy

Girl: Hi baby.
Boy: Hiii honey...(sending failed)
Girl: R u there???
Boy: Yes yesim here… (sending failed)
Girl: R u ignorng me or wat???
Boy: Honey i m nt..i m ryt here… (sending failed)
Girl: Its over..dnt evr talk to me again!
Boy: Ha ja Bhad me jaa kamini.. (message sent)

Husband and his wife
A Husband and his wife agreed that anytime they want to have sex, they will call it a ‘PHONE CALL’ so that the kids will not decode.
One day, the husband sent his son to tell his mother that,
"Daddy wants to make a phone call."
Mother replies: Tell your Dad that the Network is down today.
Dad to his son, "Go tell your mother that if there is no Network at home, I will go to a Public Phone”.
Mother tells her son to go and tell his dad,
"if he dare go to a Public Phone, she will open a Call Center at home!”

Teacher v/s Student
Teacher: What is a verb?
Student: A verb is a valve found in bicycle tyre.
Teacher: What are you saying?.
Student: It is a complete sentence.
Teacher: Are you mad?.
Student: It is a question.
Teacher: Don't be silly.
Student: It is an advice.
Teacher: Stop that nonsense.
Student: It is a command.
Teacher: You are an idiot.
Student: It is an insult!.
Teacher: Get out of my class.
Student: It is an order!
Teacher: Oh my God! What a shame!
Student: It is an exclamation.
Teacher: May God have mercy on you.
Student: It is a prayer sir!

Boy and Girl
Boy to Girl- tumhara naam kya hai??
Girl : kyu Bataun, Me Tumhein Janti bhi nahi hun x-(
Boy: Na Batao Me Konsa Tumhein Apni New Mercedes Car Main Bitha K 5Star Resturant Le Jane Wala Tha.
Girl: Jasmin, B.ComFinal Year, City College College Timing 8am To1pm Friday Timing 8 To 12pm Sunday Off Aati Papa K Sath Hun Wapsi Pe Akeli Hoti Hoon...

Awesome girl
Boy : Tum ladki hoke daaru piti ho ??:O . . . .
Awesome reply by girl : . . . . . .
To kya 2-4 peg k liye gender change karwau..?

What a shayri
Jab mene darwaza khola,
"Apki ankho me aansu,
"Chere pe hasi thi,
"Sanso me aahen,
"Dil me bebasi thi,
"Pehle Q nhi bataya K Darwze me ungli phasi thi.:-D
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Ek ladki apne ghar se bhaag gayi...
.
2 din baad wapas aane par baap ne pucha : Ab kya lene aayi ho...???
.
Ladki : Mobile ka charger
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Boy: Suno jana.
Girl: Chup raho, Khate time baat nahi karte,
khaane k baad
Ladki: Ab bolo
Boy: Teri plate mein cockroch tha, le ab ban Heroine!.:p =D
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Bhikhari : Baabuji roti milegi...???

Aadmi : Biwi ghar par nahi hai...

Bhikari : Saale chumma nahi maang raha...
roti hi to maang raha hu...
wo to tu bhi de sakta hai...
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